Holiday Roundup

I don't want to bore you silly with holiday snaps, so instead I'm going to issue some awards, American Yearbook style....

• Biggest Lovefest: Me and Calvin

• Serena Williams Bubble Butt award: Maia And look, it's makes her incredibly buoyant!

• Least Reciprocated friendship: Maia and Mister Bo
• Big Kid Award: Four way tie (Steven, Grandma, Grandpa, me)
• Least observant person: Steven. For a laugh (and, yes, I am hilarious) I moved the car twice while Steven was inside a shop and he never noticed. Or at least he never said anything, probably so as not to encourage me.
• Future Supermodel Award: Calvin
• Silly Sunburn award: Me
• Farmer's Tan award: Steven
• Most Impressed by Creatures Award: Maia, upon meeting a salamander
• Most Eccentric Child: Maia
• Campest Moment: To get up here, Jamie has to tell a tween goth who was brooding on the top tire, 'Excuse me, big boy'
• Biggest control freak about sand castles: me
• The 'Really Loves Swings' Award: Maia
• The 'Really loves Tunnels' Award: Jamie
• Future Architect Award: Maia
• World's Strongest Toddler Award: Maia
• Harry Potter Appreciation Award: Jamie
• Most Redundant Paddling But We Won't Tell Him Because He's Having Fun' Award: Jamie
• The Y Chromosome Bonding Experience Award: Liam, Conor and Jamie playing the Wii
• The Eat your Body Weight in Ice Cream Award: Jamie and Maia

• Buy Your Bodyweight in Fabric Award: Me
• Audry Hepburn Sunglasses Award: Isla

• We All Love Each Other Award: Too close to call

• We Specifically Love Calvin Award: (Just between me and you, I'm the winner)
• Sainthood Award: Despite getting more than 200 bugbites, I didn't scratch a single one. Truly.