Dear America: Please can we have nice things?

Do you know what, America? We're supposed to have a 'special relationship'. Everyone says so. You are not making me feel special right now.


Is there any reason why people in the UK aren't allowed patterned duct tape? Do you want our duct-tape doppelgangers to look lacklustre while your doppelgangers look all sassy? It's called low self-esteem, America. You are probably giving your patterned duct tape to France so they can put on all their filing cabinets and notebooks. That would be so typical.

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How to make your bills into a feature

Since Jamie started school and Maia nursery, I have been drowning in a sea of administration. Everyday they come home with newsletters, forms, requests for checks in ridiculously small denominations, permission slips. Add that to our normal bills and paperwork, and more correspondence from the NHS than I thought possible, there are papers everywhere. Literally.

On one of my previous posts about Operation: Save Our Collective Lives, auntninn said:

I'll share one of the best tips I've heard lately, though. Figure out if you're an "innie" or an "outie" person when it comes to organizing. This was a revelation to me because I love to put things away and have things in nice neat little cubbies. But I'm also an out-of-sight-out-of-mind person. So anything *really* important gets piled, because I don't trust myself to remember it if I put it away.

How true is that? Answer: heaps. I am an outie, Steven is an innie. Ergo, we have had a lot of conflict lately because I leave stuff out if I still need to deal with it and he's been filing it away and I've threatened to stab him* if he doesn't stop doing that. *Not really, but it's getting close.

So what's the answer? I need things to be out where I can see them, he needs things off of every available surface. My solution:

I recovered an old photo canvas with The Fabric That Matches Everything and made four pockets out of some Orla Kiely car fabric I scored recently. The big car pockets are for me and Steven, the small car pockets are for the kids. The orange and green fits in with the colour scheme of our kitchen. It almost makes me want to deal with the paperwork. Almost.

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Move on, move on. Nothing to see here.*

*Blog title is not strictly true. There are a couple of things to see here, and even an opportunity to assert your influence over my life.


Firstly, my hoodie pattern has been given a very nice review by Living With Punks. She let her twin boys pick their own fabrics and I LOLOLOLOL'ed that one of them picked trout fabric. Head on over to read the review, admire her handiwork, marvel at her good genes, shed a tear that her son told his friends his hoodie was purchased from a shop, and also pick up a discount code for my Etsy shop.


In a strange episode of synchronicity, my boy brief pattern was also reviewed in Blog-land yesterday and a very nice review it was. Told you so.


Finally, I am being uncharacteristically forward-thinking. Steven's brother is getting married in seven weeks and I want to find a Very Special Fabric for a dress for Maia. It will have to out-snazzy the dress I made her for our last family wedding due to my innate fears of not living up to expectations. I am thinking about the flocked taffeta above but I am unsure if it is evil. So, readers, is this fabric evil? And also, what other fancy-pants fabrics should I be looking at?

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Party like a Rock Star

Hands up if you're adorable.

Last week I spent about 92 hours grading the 3T/4T and 5Y/6Y sizes properly before taking a deep breath and cutting into a woven.

I knew that this pattern worked fine for knits, but getting your measurements right for a woven is a lot more of a precise science when you can't stretch to fit.

I only had one yard of this fabric so to fit all of the pieces in I had to eliminate hem allowances and bind the sleeve and hem edges. I love the way it looks. Incidently, this green linen has become The Perfect Colour Match Fabric.

For the neck binding I used a strip of the guitar fabric for extra Pop.

Go ahead and buy some stock in Velcro, because it seems I'm addicted to making these placket shirts.

I think if I used a heavier weight fabric and lined it, this would make a pretty swell spring jacket. Yay or nay?

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Here, Kitty Kitty

Last week, one of my favourite people to fabric swap with (Natalie from Soph4Soph) posted pics on FB of some boy cut briefs she made her daughter with Hello Kitty fabric. When I mentioned that Maia would swoon for them, she promptly posted me two different knits and I duly sent some geeky fabrics her way. What I didn't know though, that she included a fab Hello Kitty twirly circle skirt for Maia!

Maia practically had an apoplexy over it. I made the one of the knits into a Go-To shirt and because Nat and I share a supplier I was even able to perfectly match the collar and cuffs to the waistband of the skirt (which is, incidently an ace design and I wish I'd thought of it first).

Do you remember last week when you were in High School and you liked a band / show / actor before anyone else and then when they finally made it big and everyone else liked them and you'd get all indignant and furious because you were the Original Super Fan and they were just pretenders? Yeah. There might be quite a few three and four year olds gnashing their teeth over Maia's Hello Kitty ensemble and constant Hello Kitty chat, because the girl does not even know that there is anything beyond the merchandise.

Incidentally, Soph4Soph is running a comp on her blog that closes at 6PM tonight (Sat 26 Feb). Skedaddle over quicksharp for a change to win a gift certificate.

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My pre-emptive attempt at becoming Reviewer Extraordinaire

I've never posted a review on here before because no one ever offers me anything I want I have heaps of integrity and lots of money anyway. But I'm feeling left out of this review-laden blog world and rather that sit back and wait for the products and experiences to (inevitably) flood in, I'm going to do a review I wasn't even asked to do. You have to make your own opportunities, people.

So yesterday I went to my new dentist:

Pros:

• Good magazine selection in waiting room.
• Tact: New dentist did not even mention my over-zealous attempts the night before my appointment to pimp my teeth and trick him into thinking I floss all the time.
• Skill: As I hadn't been to the dentist in *cough* three years *cough*, I had one meta-tooth connected by tarter. (Well, two teeth. One on the top and one on the bottom.) Using mad dentistry skillz he successfully separated the meta-teeth into their constituent teeth.

Cons:

• Waiting room was the temperature of Hades.
• Lack of chat: Previous dentist was like long-lost best friend. It was initially creepy when he seemed to remember in minute detail what we discussed at last dental appointment. Turned out he made notes on your file. New dentist was not interested in discussing holidays or becoming best friend.
• No freebies: Was not offered new toothbrush or sensitive person toothpaste. Previous dentist, as best friend, hooked me up with products.
• Dental hygienist keep getting my tongue stuck in suction pipe.
• Zeal: technically this is a Pro (see 'Skill' above) but the separating of my teeth and the evisceration of my gums made me resemble:

Unintended bonus:

• I have no issues with my teeth that require further work. Steven, however, found out at his appointment that he has two cavities. Me= Moral High Ground. Steven= Dental Cash Cow.

On balance, New Dentist was not as likely to become my friend in real life as Previous Dentist. However, he was way less menacing than First Dentist, who once dropped a (mid-drilling) drill onto my lip and on another occassion almost shot my dad while hunting. Therefore, middling on a personal level. Professionally, seems to know his stuff.

If you are a medical practitioner in Edinburgh who is interested in having your services reviewed, please contact me. As a family, we have a lot of experience with the medical profession and have had no less than four doctor, three nurse and four dental appointments in the last month alone! I will provide a balanced review and a relevant True Blood picture to illustrate your service. Examples of my work:

This is me giving a blood sample.

This is me having my smear.

Disclaimer: Obviously I received no compensation for this review. Yet. But if I've blogged about it it's a valid business expense, right?

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The Sheer Injustice Shirt

And now I remember why I don't make Jamie things very much: because Maia goes bat-sh*t crazy with righteous indignation. 'WHAT ABOUT ME?!' she wails, 'WHERE IS MY NEW SHIRT?!' Indeed, it is a very injust world when only 96% of things are for you.

But there we go then. A new shirt was duly made and the cosmic balance was restored. I stash-busted again with this rainbow french terry I've been hoarding. The placket is emerald green twill, again with velcro closures, and the same used as binding. As you can see, there are (store-bought) rainbow trousers to complete the ensemble.

Altogether, she is nonchalant at best but probably closer to the wrong side of louche.

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