Wednesday, 11 March 2009


Let the numbers do the talking

I'm a bit too swamped to write a big post today, so I thought I would just list some pertinent stats:
  • Total orders in the last 24 hours: 9
  • Clothing orders in the last 24 hours: 5
  • Plain dry bread rolls consumed by Jamie in last 24 hours: 4
  • Hours slept last night: 4
  • Number of times I had to reheat my coffee this morning because I kept forgetting to drink it: 3
  • Children with conjunctivitis: 2
  • Jackets awaiting buttons: 1
  • Number of minutes expected to wait for Dad at the bus stop yesterday: 10
  • Number of minutes actually spent waiting for Dad while walking up and down busy road trying to enforce hand-holding: 120
  • Number of times I considered phoning The Samaritans while walking up and down a busy road trying to enforce hand-holding: 20
  • Number of dog poos gormlessly stepped in while walking about waiting for Dad and thinking about phoning The Samaritans: 2
  • Cupcakes left: 2
  • Testers waiting for tutorials: 2
  • Number of times I've caught sight of myself in the mirror and thought I needed a haircut: 40
  • Number of times I've caught sight of myself and thought I needed Botox: 150
  • Movie dates cancelled with Steven: 2
  • Fingers sliced with cutting knife: 1
  • Number of cheerios dumped on the floor by my lovely children: 4000
  • Anonymous slanderers on my blog: 1
  • Number of Maia's babies that freak me right out: 2

Okay, I think that about covers it.


  1. I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds children's dolls look slightly strange.

    Hope things improve - I sympathise as I'm waiting for the new freezer with a nearly 4 year old who's deeply impatient to be able to make ice lollys.

  2. ps i've just tried to email but for some reason (probably my exhaustion) it didn't work. About your childcare, have you tried contacting the local college who might do NNEB or whatever it's called now (nursery nurse education board) and seeing if they have anyone who wants to do work placement - my sister used to do it, look after a child or two for a day a week and in return did "observations" (writing up what the child did in normal playing / whatever behaviour). Usually for a very minimal fee - bus fares or lunch money. Admittedly this was over 10 years ago, but I doubt it's changed enough to not have the work placement bit.

  3. My comments, by the numbers:

    2nd degree burns incurred from spraying hot tea through my nose when reading your post: 3

    Keyboards ruined by tea/nasal fluid dousing: 1

    Coworkers intrigued by odd sound made by me laughing and snorting hot tea: 3

    Minutes I spent looking at your first picture wondering what it was, even after I knew what it was: 2.5

    Dolls belonging to my children that I have made "disappear" due to their freakish/demonic/just plain scary appearance: 1

    Readers grateful to have read this after a long night with a very sick little one: at least 1

  4. 99 - number of times I think how lucky I am mine are all grown ups....

    100 - number of times I worry about all the awful things that happen to young adults these days.

  5. Dolls are freaky!!

    Im so glad that you have brought this up. these captured so wonderfully in your images are particularly freaky... but the worst kind are those porcelain ones.. blurgh!

    stick to teddies I say.

    p.s. you deserve a long soak in a bath. x