The Time Machine

Here I am, one month before my thirtieth birthday, and do I feel my age? Nope, I feel fifteen. Everyone remember being fifteen? The drama, the crushes, the racing heart, the giggling? Well, yesterday I took a trip don't memory lane courtesy of Blottedcopybook. After reading about my latest celebrity crush, she did the modern equivalent of passing him a note in class. She twittered him. And then she emailed him. Saying "My mate likes you." And then we spent the rest of the day giggling, with me blushing bright red every time I think about it. I'll never sleep again, lest he actually twitters me back. Or sends an injunction.

So I'm not actually here right now, I'm at Treefest. And with the heavens chucking it down, I'm probably cowering inside my tent, alone and destitute. I might even be reading the paper. Which will at least be more pleasant than reading the paper at home:

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It's Criminal

Not made by me for once, can be found here

I've been watching a lot of Criminal Minds recently, mainly because it's on from midnight to 2AM. I know, I know... I'd be more productive if I didn't have the TV on, but it keeps me awake and a girl's got to have a little bit of a treat for her diligence.

As you know, I'm been on the look out for an age-inappropriate crush after Shia LaBeouf was disqualified for incestuous intentions and Josh Peck for egregious hair. To be honest, I've not been giving it too much attention with all this sewing I've been doing. So, oblivious to my quest, sewing away in the early hours, demented with fatigue, Criminal Minds on in the background .... (To save me embarrassment can anyone related to me by blood or marriage please skip forward to the next paragraph) The. Hottest. Kiss.



Yikes. I wasn't prepared for that. And I totally haven't watched that a bunch of times since.

If you're wondering so you can do your own research, his name is Matthew Gray Gubler. Technically this isn't an age-inappropriate crush, he's only a year younger than me but he was born in a different decade than me so I'm willing to bend the rules. This is what he thinks of me:


And just look, he likes doing this:


Yep, he splices pictures together. Just. Like. Me. He's posted that on his MySpace page, to show me how compatible we are.

You can learn a lot from Criminal Minds. Like last night, they were discussing how they needed to analyse the un-sub's Love Map. Well, here's mine:




All right, I'm ready for everyone to disagree....

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Sweat shop update

It's Treefest this weekend so I've been working assembly line trying to round out my stock. The kids were at the childminder's today so I finally finished up my two massive ongoing projects....

Thirty tunics. Here's a selection:


The only upside to making thirty tunics all at once is that I got to use my new fabrics:


This is my favourite:


Fifteen peasant tops (I already had more than 15 in my stock):


You might have seen various places that I've made most of these before, but you probably haven't seen these:


I did make both of these last summer but I gave them to my niece Isla.

As you can probably tell, I'm not feeling too effervescent. Assembly line sewing kills me.

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Mini Mod Dress pattern giveaway

I'm so busy just now getting everything ready (or not) for Treefest so I can't stick around and dazzle you with my scintillating chat, so I'll let the photos do the talking....


This cute dress (and the sweet girl) were made by the lovely Tiny White Daisies. So with another pattern through testing and the order put in at the printers, another giveaway!


This style is inspired by 60's style mini dresses and it would look equally good in summer or layered for winter. The armholes and neckline are self-faced and it's a pretty quick and easy pattern to come together, you could definitely make a couple in a night. It comes in sizes 18m/2T and 3T/4T.


I love her dress, it's so sweet with that flowery box pleat! If you're partial to the three panel dress instead, the pattern includes that as well!


To enter the giveaway leave a comment on this post with your favourite holiday food. We're off to the States in less than two weeks, and we're looking forward to Dairy Queen most of all! M&M Blizzards, here I come! I'll pick a winner on Sunday.

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The Doctor's: A short play

Today I finally brought Jamie to the doctor's to discuss his hearing. We've all been trying to figure out for some time now if he is hard of hearing or just infuriating. While his behaviour in every other way suggests he's just infuriating, the time has come to figure out if there is a medical reason so off to the doctors we went...

Scene: Crowded doctor's surgery. Forced to wait 30+ minutes. Toys and magazine removed because of swine flu. NB. Please remember Jamie shouts everything.

Jamie: Wot we doing?
Me: Waiting for the doctor.
Jamie: Wot you saying?
Me: Waiting. For. The. Doctor.
Jamie: Wot?
Me: Waiting for the doctor!!
Jamie: Right.
Maia (pointing at every other person waiting individually): Look! Man! Lady! Lady! Man! Man! Lady! Man!
Me: That's right. They're waiting too.
Jamie: Wot you saying?
Me: I'm talking to Maia.
Jamie: Wot you saying?
Me: Nothing.
Maia (pointing to man sitting near us): Look! Man! Wot man doing?
Me: Waiting.
Man gets up and moves. Lady gets up to go to the bathroom.
Jamie: Where's the lady going?
Me: Bathroom.
Jamie: Wot you saying?
Me: Bathroom!
Jamie: She's going for a wee wee! She's going for a poo!
Me: I don't know. Maybe. Now shush.
Jamie: I need to go wee-wee too!
Me: Now we have to wait, the lady's in there.
Jamie: Jamie: I need to go wee-wee too!
Me: Wait! The lady's in there.
Lady exits bathroom.
Jamie: She's finished her wee wee! And her poo!
Lady gives me the dirtiest look ever. We go to the bathroom for a wee wee and return to seats. Man arrives, sits next to us. Maia climbs into my lap and shoves her hands down my top.
Maia: Mmmmm. Boobies.
Me: Maia, stop it.
Maia lifts her top, touches herself.
Maia (to adjacent man): Look, Maia's boobies.
Me: Maia, stop it.
Maia shoves her hands down my top again.
Maia (to adjacent man): Look, Mummy's boobies.
Me: Please stop!!
Maia starts crying.
Jamie: Wot you saying to Maia?
Me: I'm telling Maia to stop.
Jamie: Why she crying?
Me: She just is.
Jamie: Maia, what's wrong?
Maia: Mummy.
Jamie: Oh, okay. You want an ice cream?
Maia: Yeah, yeah!
Jamie: Mum, Maia would like an ice cream.
Me: No, your not having ice cream. It's 9:30 and we're at the doctor's.
Maia (throwing herself on floor): Ice cream, ice cream, ice cream!
Doctor arrives and call us through.
Doctor: Right, what can I do for you?
Me (thinks): Euthanise me.
Me (says): I'm worried about his hearing. He talks really loudly and he doesn't seem to understand what anyone is saying ever.
Doctor (to Jamie): Do you have some trouble with your ears?
Jamie: Wot?
Doctor: Your. ears.
Jamie: I hear voices in my head.
Doctor (alarmed): You hear voices in your head?!
Jamie: Yeah, they're speaking. In my head.
Doctor hovers over his keyboard, deciding whether to type 'Schizophrenia?'.
Me: I think he means noise, not voices.
Doctor: Oh, I guess I won't type that in my notes. Let have a look then.
Doctor looks in his ears.
Doctor: Does he snore?
Me: Yes.
Doctor: I think it's his adenoids.

The End.

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Bittersweet bicycles

A customer sent me some beautiful bicycle fabric to be made into something for her daughter (remember The Coolest Girl in the World?) and I fell in love. It's called Dream Bikes by Heather Ross and you absolutely cannot find it anymore. Which is pretty much a crime against humanity, because it's gorgeous.


The challenge was that she only had a scrap left, less than a yard and a bit irregular. Luckily she had plenty to coordinating dotty fabric to send my way too.


And I managed to squeeze this out of it! I love it so much, I wish I could keep it. In fact, I wish I could wear it.

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Yay and Boo

There I was minding my own business yesterday, cutting out dozens of tunics to sew for Treefest. I was on a self-enforced ban from the computer so I could get as much as possible done before the kids were back. On the way to get another coffee I thought, 'I'll just have a little look...' And I saw that my views on Etsy had jumped up by hundreds. 'Front Page, Front Page!' I thought. But it was already gone....

There's my little Fushia and Lime Matryoshka top at the top left of this gorgeous Raspberry treasury by the very talented Jane from TheDoghouse! You can still check it out for the rest of the day to see her other gorgeous picks featuring McEtsy sellers (that's where she found me), Handmade4Hounds and Etsy for Animals.

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