Setting: On family holiday in the US. Unbeknownst to me, my old nemesis Thrush also made the transatlantic trip. Cue visit to pharmacy.
Pharmacist: Can I help you?
Me: Do you sell Diflucan over the counter?
Pharmacist (incredulous): What did you say?!?!
Me: Diflucan. Fluconazole. Do you sell it over the counter?
Pharmacist (shaking head at my brazenness): Absolutely not! You need to go to your doctor for that! (mutters to self) Addict. Junkie.
Me: I'm on holiday, I don't have a doctor here.
Pharmacist: Well, might I suggest the 'Feminine Care' section of aisle 14? We have a vast selection of over-priced, ineffectual and disturbingly named products. You can't miss it.
Me: Thanks, you've been very helpful.
Walks over to Aisle 14, following the flashing arrows that alert all other customers to your predicament.
Me (to self): How will I ever be able to choose between Vagisil and Vagistat? Gyne-lotrimin? Or Vagi-guard? Hmmm, this brand 'Faultless' appeals to my sense of injustice that this happens all the time...
Fills arms with embarrassingly named products and goes to counter, drops haul before teenage girl cashier.
Cashier (cheerfully): So how are you tonight?
Me (with sarcasm): Splendid.
Cashier: That'll be a million dollars.
Me: Here you go.
Cashier (perkily): You have a great night!!
Me: I have a feeling it'll be fantastic, thanks.