Monday, 12 April 2010


Operational debrief

Apologies for the lack of posting here. We are halfway through the nineteen day / 456 hours / 27360 minute nursery Easter break and I have commenced Operation: Keep the Children Out of the House at All Costs Lest I Kill Them. Here's a breakdown of our day:

Total buses journeys taken today: 6
Movies watched: 1
Number of times I threatened to take them home before the movie even started: 16
Number of times they complained 'Is it over? / I want to go home / I don't like it' during the movie: 116
Number of times I muttered 'I don't know why I bother, you little ingrates' to myself: 2639
Number of times they said 'That was brilliant!!' at the end of the movie: 2
Paper crowns procured from Build-a-Bear: 2
Aggressive employees practising the hard sell to toddlers in Build-a-Bear Company: 5
Shit-fits that I wouldn't, in fact, let them build a bear: 1 (Maia)
Number of coffees in a fishbowl consumed by yours truly: 1
Handles required to lift the coffee: 2
Inane DVDs purchased: 1
Very inane DVDs purchased: 1
Number of times I remembered Edinburgh is really rather beautiful: 1
Well behaved children at the playground: 2 (my own, of course)
Feral children at the playground: 300
Ice creams consumed: 2
Moments captured: 1


  1. LOL. Oh the joy of easter holidays - happy days :o) You'll look back at these weeks and smile (but not for a while....) xox

  2. Lol, lol, lol.

    Shit-fits. Feral Children. Coffee in a fishbowl.

    You are perfection my dear. Hope you survive the rest of the week.

  3. I'm so very very glad that Kathryn is now old enough to go to the out of school club, even if she doesn't like it - or rather thinks now that saying she doesn't like it will get her a nice treat... Looks like lovely weather there again though. We've had cold and cloudy today.

  4. Lord I wish more mums would admit to wanting to thrash their kidlets and making threats :) I'm already worrying about how I'm going to survive the summer holidays...

  5. Hang in there! And enjoy the beautiful sunshine. It looks gorgeous.

  6. Wow - that house (castle?) in the background of the fountain is beautiful! It's great that you paused during the beatings (not your children of course, but maybe the other children?) to recognize the beauty of your city.

  7. @Sister - That's no house! That's Edinburgh Castle! And it's very beautiful indeed, inside and out.

    @Kitschycoo - Are your Easter hols going on forever as well? My kids have 19 days off this hol - **19**!!! Whatever were the school calendar planners thinking???

  8. Heehee! LOVE this post. Poor Mummy. And that photo at the end is sooooooo adorable

  9. Haha. I love you yet again Amanda! Easter hols are going on forever here too and I have a huge big weekend show to prepare for which is on 24th go back the Tuesday before I leave on the Friday...can you hear the panic in my voice?
    Husband will look after kids for brief periods of time in exchange for sexual favours but really, I'm too busy for that ;)

  10. ha ha ha, I think you did exceedingly well not to murder them or leave them in build a bear! lol.

    am i the only one that looked at that picture in the park and wondered what on earth that woman lying down in the background was wearing?

  11. he he he - you always make me laugh - we are having a great break but that's cause my kids are a bit older and don't fight {much} very soon it'll be better x