My pre-emptive attempt at becoming Reviewer Extraordinaire

I've never posted a review on here before because no one ever offers me anything I want I have heaps of integrity and lots of money anyway. But I'm feeling left out of this review-laden blog world and rather that sit back and wait for the products and experiences to (inevitably) flood in, I'm going to do a review I wasn't even asked to do. You have to make your own opportunities, people.

So yesterday I went to my new dentist:

Pros:

• Good magazine selection in waiting room.
• Tact: New dentist did not even mention my over-zealous attempts the night before my appointment to pimp my teeth and trick him into thinking I floss all the time.
• Skill: As I hadn't been to the dentist in *cough* three years *cough*, I had one meta-tooth connected by tarter. (Well, two teeth. One on the top and one on the bottom.) Using mad dentistry skillz he successfully separated the meta-teeth into their constituent teeth.

Cons:

• Waiting room was the temperature of Hades.
• Lack of chat: Previous dentist was like long-lost best friend. It was initially creepy when he seemed to remember in minute detail what we discussed at last dental appointment. Turned out he made notes on your file. New dentist was not interested in discussing holidays or becoming best friend.
• No freebies: Was not offered new toothbrush or sensitive person toothpaste. Previous dentist, as best friend, hooked me up with products.
• Dental hygienist keep getting my tongue stuck in suction pipe.
• Zeal: technically this is a Pro (see 'Skill' above) but the separating of my teeth and the evisceration of my gums made me resemble:

Unintended bonus:

• I have no issues with my teeth that require further work. Steven, however, found out at his appointment that he has two cavities. Me= Moral High Ground. Steven= Dental Cash Cow.

On balance, New Dentist was not as likely to become my friend in real life as Previous Dentist. However, he was way less menacing than First Dentist, who once dropped a (mid-drilling) drill onto my lip and on another occassion almost shot my dad while hunting. Therefore, middling on a personal level. Professionally, seems to know his stuff.

If you are a medical practitioner in Edinburgh who is interested in having your services reviewed, please contact me. As a family, we have a lot of experience with the medical profession and have had no less than four doctor, three nurse and four dental appointments in the last month alone! I will provide a balanced review and a relevant True Blood picture to illustrate your service. Examples of my work:

This is me giving a blood sample.

This is me having my smear.

Disclaimer: Obviously I received no compensation for this review. Yet. But if I've blogged about it it's a valid business expense, right?

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